You’re never to old to “Come Out!”

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There’s no magical age of self-discovery. After all, did your parents, and their parents, and their parents have a handbook that says, “Johnny’s going to discover his penis and the pleasure of an orgasm when he’s 13 years, 232 days, 14 hours, and 15 seconds old?” I think not. Coming of age and into ourselves can’t be found in any off the shelf handbook about growing up.

Sure there are plenty of tips and tricks for leaving the toddler years, elementary school days, and adolescent, hormone raging “God I’m so secure as a teen,” behind. Truth is, they are just tips and observations. How we go through life, facing the twists and turns, is all individual.

Coming out is no different. Whether you’re 10, 12, 35, 39, 43, 55, 60, 72, coming out happens at exactly at the same time for everyone of us…when we’re ready. So what is and isn’t there to fear about coming out later in life? Click here to find out and then watch this Huffpost Live Segment to get some additional insights!

Turning 51! It’s all relative!

Birthday

Yesterday I became a member of the 50+ crowd. My elementary, tween, teen, 20′s, 30 something’s, and 40′s are fading into the shadows of days gone by. No regrets, just fond memories.

Now, if you’d asked me a year ago how I felt about turning 50, I would have growled, “Bring that up again and I’ll take all 50 of those lit birthday candles and shove them up every available orifice you have!” Yeah, 50 wasn’t a pretty milestone for me!

In all honesty and transparency, I was a little nervous about how I would feel turning 50+ given last year’s experience. Then something shifted. You can capture the whole story over on YourTango – Click Here!

Stop Lying To Yourself About Lack Of Success.

Success

You want it. Success, however you define it. Then, those crazy making voices show up and tell you…

  • You’re stupid
  • You’re not talented
  • You’re unable to play the game
  • You’re living a pipe dream
  • You’re going to lose good friends if you become successful

Really? How close are we here? No matter how much you DESIRE success, you’ve got to get out of your own way, and give yourself permission to go be as damn successful as you want.

It can become a really screwed up mess if we don’t stay true to who we are and our inner desires. No shame is required. No guilt to lay all over ourselves. No reason to not believe.

Success is simply…

How you define it…

What it does for you…

Who it makes you become…

Why it makes you feel good…

Where it will take you…

When you will allow yourself to go for it…

Are you ready? Ready to go beyond a shadow of a doubt and step into your success with no apologies. If so, then go for it, and go for it hard!

How safe are you from your own jealousy?

jealousy

Admit it. We all want our cake and to it too. Just us, no one else. Ok, maybe not all of us, all the time, but as gay men, there seems to be this tendency to get a little jealous if we can’t have the hottest guy, the coolest clothes, or be the bell of the ball…even if you’re not the atypical gay guy.

Here’s a little secret I learned about my own jealous tendencies as a gay man, and I’m thinking it just might help you too.

Jealousy comes from feeling out of control!

That’s it! No more, no less. Think about it. If you can’t get the hottest guy to pay attention to you, you’re unable to control the situation and suddenly you feel jealous when another guy catches his eye. Or, you walk into a social event, dressed to the nines, only to find that everyone else is dressed to the tens. You have no way of controlling how they got the better looking outfits instead of you, so your little playmate Jealousy crops up.

Make sense?

Even if you’re not prone to being jealous, the next time your annoying little jealousy visitor makes an appearance, ask yourself, “What about this situation is making me feel out of control?” Once you have that answer, you can tell jealousy to take a hike and accept, you can’t control what you can’t control, except your own jealous nature.

Never Forget Who Brings You To The Dance!

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Movement, a beat, and a shimmy. It’s all about your style when you’re dancing – good or bad – it’s still your style. Yet, where did that style come from? How did you learn to be so on beat, or off beat as a gay man? And does this style even have anything to do with being a gay man? I think it does, provided you don’t forget who brought you to the dance of being a gay man.

I’m not talking about who coerced you, outed you, or took you gently by the hand out of the hidden dance floor of your closet life to the truth of who you are now. Instead, I want you to focus on you. The guy who actually said, “I can do this. I’m coming out!” Yep, he’s the one, who made you finally take the bold leap of faith to be exactly who you were meant to be.

Now look at you. Hung up in not being able to make a relationship last. Fearful that you’ll always be in a dead-end job. Unsure if you’ll have enough money to get through retirement. All valid concerns. Yet, are they something to cause ourselves to lock up in fear? Not if you remember to invite your bold beautiful self to the dance once again, just like you did when you came out of the closet.

Whether you Tango, Salsa, Krump, or Jitterbug your way to the dance of life, bring your whole self to the dance of challenges and fears, just like you did once before, and let those smooth moves work for you once again. After all, it only takes you to change view on the drudgery of life and turn it into your own signature dance move!

Man Up Minute: Gay Man’s Guide To Preparing For A Career Change!

Dead end job. Bored to the hilt. Can’t stand your boss or the people you work with? Making a career change as a gay man doesn’t have to be a chore! Seriously! It doesn’t!

Hey! I’m Rick Clemons and I’m known as The Gay Man’s Life Coach, and these are “Man Up Minute” quick videos for gay men to live their life in the grandest, most fabulous way possible!
Rick Clemons
http://www.lifecoachrick.com
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheGayMansLifeCoach
Twitter: https://twitter.com/RickClemons
Complimentary Session: http://bit.ly/17UbLLa

Man Up Minute: Gay Sex Might Be Scary But Doesn’t Have To Be!

Can gay sex be scary? Maybe if you want to do it your way but feel like you have to do it like everyone else. Let’s explore how to be comfortable having gay sex your way!

Hey! I’m Rick Clemons and I’m known as The Gay Man’s Life Coach, and these are “Man Up Minute” quick videos for gay men to live their life in the grandest, most fabulous way possible!
Rick Clemons
http://www.lifecoachrick.com
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheGayMansLifeCoach
Twitter: https://twitter.com/RickClemons
Complimentary Session: http://bit.ly/17UbLLa

What I Don’t Know About Being Gay!

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What I Don’t Know About Being Gay!

I never thought that once I came out of the closet that I would continue to stand on moving sand about my sexuality. Not really questioning it, just always finding it interesting that no matter how old I get (even at 50) I still don’t know as much as I thought I would about being gay.

In fact, as I celebrated my 50th birthday just a little over a month ago, this thought really hung over me (no pun intended). As I contemplated everything from being a parent to living in a long term relationship with a guy I adore, I still uncovered a few things I don’t know about being gay. Why? Because, being gay is an evolution of a lifetime.

Here’s what I still don’t know about being gay.

  1. I don’t know why some guys are more effeminate than others, but I really don’t give a damn.
  2. I don’t know how I’ll cope when the day comes that I might lose my partner, but there’s no point worrying about it.
  3. I don’t know if my grandchildren will accept me, but I’ll shower them with love no matter what.
  4. I don’t know who will be the first gay president, but I’ll smile regardless of whether I’m here to see it or not.
  5. I don’t know if my sexual energy will stay with me, but I’ll sure enjoy it while I can.
  6. I don’t know when we’ll see full equality, but I’ll remember how hard we fought to achieve it.
  7. I don’t know where the next generations will take the gay movement, but I’m glad I helped them have it easier.
  8. I don’t know why lack of self-confidence continues to plague gay men, but I’m excited each time I hear a guy say, “I’m enough!”
  9. I don’t know how many years it will take to heal the ignorance about homosexuality, but I do know “It does get better!”
  10. I don’t know when “coming out” will no longer be part of our vocabulary, but I’m glad I spent my life helping those who needed the support.

The point of today’s blog, really isn’t about “What I Don’t Know About Being Gay.” It’s what I do know, and how much more energizing, fun, happy it makes me when I focus on, “What I Do Know,” that matters. And, if it happens to do with me being gay, then rainbow happy dances all around for everyone!

Man Up Minute: Where Have All The Good Men Gone?

Yes all the good men are gay and coupled, or straight and suffering through heterosexuality. Uh…not really! There’s plenty of great gay men just waiting for you if you know where to go look for them. In fact, there probably closer than you think!

Hey! I’m Rick Clemons and I’m known as The Gay Man’s Life Coach, and these are “Man Up Minute” quick videos for gay men to live their life in the grandest, most fabulous way possible!
Rick Clemons
http://www.lifecoachrick.com
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheGayMansLifeCoach
Twitter: https://twitter.com/RickClemons
Complimentary Session: http://bit.ly/17UbLLa

Man Up Minute: Keep Your Distance, It’s Easier!

One of the things we gay men are really good at is keeping our distance so we don’t get hurt. Really? Is that what you really want? Or do you want to get a little closer and start seeing what can happen for you as a gay man!

Hey! I’m Rick Clemons and I’m known as The Gay Man’s Life Coach, and these are “Man Up Minute” quick videos for gay men to live their life in the grandest, most fabulous way possible!
Rick Clemons

http://www.lifecoachrick.com

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheGayMansLifeCoach
Twitter: https://twitter.com/RickClemons
Complimentary Session: http://bit.ly/17UbLLa

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