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5 Reasons Men Suck At Being Curious

Hey guys I’m calling you out on your shit. Don’t take it personal. I’m calling myself out too!

Seems that we’re only curious when it comes to sex, food, money, and careers.

Ok, I know, we get curious about where the nearest pot is to poop when we need to take a dump, but that’s what I call a curiosity out of necessity.

To be honest, the surface curiosities aren’t what I’m talking about. I’m talking about the stuff that goes deep. The kind of stuff us guys – straight, gay, trans, CIS-gendered – refuse to go explore.

It’s the kind of stuff that gets us in trouble, only because we’re afraid to step in our own self-made crap. Yet, the bluff we’re pulling on ourselves by avoiding the deeper curiosities, is more harmful than a lifelong case of blue balls – although it actually feels just as devastating.

Truthfully we men suck. Suck at getting curious. It’s what I call the constipation of the curiosities.

We’re afraid to get curious for fear of losing our contrived sense of self. If we’re curious about vulnerability, mindfulness, empathy, compassion, etc. then we will castrate ourselves from the bro-hood, and be banished forever…or so we think.

That’s why we SUCK at being CURIOUS.

But that’s just the tip of the masculine poop that makes us suck at being curious beings.

We suck because…


  • We lost our little boy wonder. Sure, we still act like little boys, more than we will ever admit, but that loss of boy wonder, is the frickin’ fire that lights up ability to be curious, even if you were a wallflower, nerd, and always picked last for every team sport. Little boy wonder came with us into the world. We loved it, we breathed it, we made messes with it, and sure, every so often we got punished for it. Truth is, our little boy wonder never let us down, always pushed us forward, and taught us to wonder, wonder, wonder. It is in the wonder that we find our unsolved answers – but not if we lose the ability to be curious and wonder.
  • Face value became the status quo. We’ve become numb, and rather than rock the boat, we accept so much for face value. “It is what it is!” Really, “Is It?” Not 100% sure anything is what it is, until you get curious and ask, “What proof do I have that this is, what it is?” Scientific, hand of God, or the powers that be, all lead us to believe certain non-disputable truths, as they should. Yet, we tend to buy into so much other stuff and accept it as the status quo, simply because we won’t ask questions, no scratch that, ask the right questions. Why? It’s that suck thing again. We suck at asking the right questions because it’s easier to ask the question that gives us the quickest answer and the least amount of effort to obtain. Kind of lazy don’t you think? Why not man up and stop living a status quo life?
  • Our super heroes get killed off. My favorite super hero was the Road Runner. I loved how he always outsmarted Wylie Coyote and was so quick to get wherever he wanted. My hero made me want to be smart, quick, and kind of a smart ass. Then, I misused my super hero desires. I got smart, but did it only for a grade. I got quick, but only to get stuff done and out of the way. I got to be a smart ass in all the wrong ways, and ended up in trouble at every turn. I let my super hero die. Then, late in my 30’s I brought my super hero back to life. I started pursuing smart for doing good. I leveraged my quick to get the right things done. I began using my smart ass ways to tell stories, teach lessons, and point out the obvious as a motivational speaker. I brought my super hero back to life. Beep, beep – maybe it’s time you bring yours back to life too.
  • Pride makes us pitiful. Nothing wrong with having pride, but hey, when it gets in the way of getting answers, and doing the thing you most are meant to do, well then your prideful ways make you a pitiful mess that needs to get curious. Suck up your pride, barf up the “I’ve got this” pill, and get curious and as for some help. GASP, I know. Us, ask for help. Get over it stud. You didn’t get where you are, doing it on your own, and you won’t get where you’re going on your own. If you think you will, then, remember you got here because you’re Momma had some help getting you out of the womb. She asked for help to get through the pain of birthing you, the least you can do is continue the pattern of shucking your pride and ask for help when you need it. That means – get over yourself big guy!
  • We think too much with the wrong head. No, not your penis, even though thinking with that head to much can lead to a crisis of curiosities. The wrong head I’m referring to is the one that is clouded with “I’ve got it all figured out.” It’s our ego, which is just as frequently overstated as is the size of the manhood between our legs. Our ego constantly prevents us from exercising curiosity because we’ve got it all figured out. Every little detail. Who-to, what-to, when-to, where-to, and how-to. It’s the one feeding us the biggest crock of B.S., then we’re suddenly frustrated, angry, ready to kick someone’s ass when the whole time we’ve been allowing that damn ego to rule our world, when in reality we deserve to bend over and take that kick in the ass from ourselves. All along, we simply need to let the head, the heart, and the soul work in unison to be more curious, rather than letting the ego play quarterback to the game that shouldn’t be being played at all!

As painful as it is, we can fix our own sucked up ways of not living a curious life simply by awakening our little boy wonder, telling the status quo to take a hike, breathing life back into our Super Hero, leaning into pride with purposeful intention, and asking our ego to play nicely in the sandbox of our life with our heart and soul.

Then, if all else fails, get curious and ask yourself, “If I allow curiosity to rule my life, how much different with my life be?”

Photo by Joseph Rosales on Unsplash

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